||||SongZiGe

Alicia Keys broke my heart with this one. I’m not gonna lie, the beat is tough, the melody of the hook is contagious as hell, and the song easily gets stuck in damn my head at the mere thought of it. I mainly blame Beyonce’s chicken head tendencies…but Alicia, you done hurt me soul…
 
‘Cause I be irate when I hear “Put It In A Love Song”.
 

Image via: Just CD Cover
 
Alicia Keys Feat. Beyonce – Put It In A Love Song

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

 

“Say you love me, Say you love me,
Then put it in a love song.
Say you need me, Say you need me,
Then write it in a letter for me.
Say you want me, Say you want me,
Then text me on the cell phone.
Say you love me, Say you love me,
Then put me in a love song…”

 
I’m an aspiring songwriter; and I have had a few girls ask me to write them songs before. I’m sure they weren’t 100% serious; but regardless, I smiled and in my head I was like, “um..no”…
 
You want me to write you a frickin love song? Touch my heart. Make me fall in love with you in a way I’ve never fell in love before. Or au contraire, be a bitch, break my heart, and make me feel a pain that I’ve never felt. That’s how songwriting works; it works off of inspiration, not nagging, not a feeling of entitlement, and not chickenheadism.
 
I’m 95% sure – or at least really want to believe – that Beyonce either wrote the damn thing or teamed up with or snatched the song from her chicken-head anthem writing associate(s), and then swindled Ms. Keys into singing it too.
 
Now, I’m not a Beyonce hater; but I’m not her biggest fan when it comes to her chicken head anthems. You know, the dumb songs that make women chant the most basic sounding shit. e.g….
 
 
Beyonce – Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)

“If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it.
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it;
‘Cause if you like it, then you shoulda put a ring on it”

C’mon son. That basically means, “if you enjoy having sex with me, you better buy me a ring and marry me, or I’ll probably go have sex with the next guy instead…”. Look, damnit. I’m sorry, but marriage isn’t some shit you just do to keep having sex with somebody; and it shouldn’t be mentioned as a threat either. I’m saying, is that how she got Hov?
 
 
Destiny’s Child – Bills, Bills, Bills

“Can you pay my bills?
Can you pay my telephone bills?
Can you pay my automo’bills?
Then maybe we can chill.
I don’t think you do,
So you and me are through.”

Now that basically means, “You can keep having sex stay with me as long as you give me money.” Pretty much prostitution at its best.
 
 
Alright, fine. Maybe it’s just music for ladies to chant at the “playas” and “broke dudes” who thought that they could pipe all day with out bringing something else to the table. But “Put It In A Love Song” brought things to a whole nother level on a different playing field. It’s a song about taking advantage of the sweet, emo and creative types. You know, doods like me…
 
I pretty much spent the entire summer of 2009 writing songs for and about someone that I was in love with; and yet now, I have nothing to show for it. She didn’t ask me to write her a song, but I did it. So when this chicken head anthem came along, it pissed me the eff off.
 
So you know what, honestly, the real reason i be irate when I hear the damn song is that I can hear said girl chanting the shit like it’s cute. Especially because she had the tendency to show off when people did nice things for her…
 
There you have it.
End rant.
 
Oh, and I left her nameless because this post wasn’t really supposed to be about her. But she knows who she is; and you’ll know after a few more music association posts…
 
Fuck.